From the Heart - The Comparison Game

There has been some talk lately of the comparisons we make with others. We look at our lives and then try to set ours next to someone else’s. We see differences and sometimes we let those differences make us feel inadequate or insufficient. We think “my life doesn’t look that way” and we can become down on ourselves and jealous of others.

I have fallen into this trap more than once myself over the years. Someone else has nicer clothes or they drive an nicer car. She is a size ___ and I am a size ___. That person seems to have it all together and they don’t have any problems. More currently, for me at least, so-and-so has more followers than I do. Or how about this one “that person’s blog is more organized than mine and looks like a professional built it.” Ouch!

We all play the Comparison Game at times in our lives. I think it is human nature to do this. But it is damaging to ourselves and to others. If we are not careful to avoid this game, we will miss out on the very life we were created for.

The world of social media seems to have expanded this problem. We see the lives of others in the ‘squares’ of Instagram, on the posts of Facebook or the characters of Twitter. What we might be forgetting though, is that people tend to show the highlights of their lives on social media. We see the vacations and excursions people go on but we often do not see the turmoil that it took to save for the trip, plan for the trip, pack for the trip and gather up everyone for the trip. I have been on vacations with little ones and it is not always a bed of roses 😉 Yet on social media we see all the smiling faces and the beautiful scenery. It can be easy to fall into the trap of contrasting what we see with what we are experiencing in our own lives.

The behind the scenes type of episodes on some of the home renovation shows is a great example of this. Each week we see the specifically curated scenes that the producers and directors want us to see. But during the behind the scenes episodes, we get a glimpse of all that it takes to get those scenes looking just perfect. There is a lot that goes on outside of the view of the camera. Same with our lives and everyones else.

Whether it is vacations, our homes, our wardrobe and makeup or just everyday life, we all need to be careful that our lives might not resemble what we see online. We see every aspect of our lives, but we are only seeing glimpses of the lives of others. I am not meaning to be judgmental with this line of thinking, not all who post on social media have the intent to make their live’s seem perfect, nor are they all trying to make others feel bad about their own lives. I am just saying as a reader or participant in social media, I need to be careful not to fall into that trap.

We are all different with varying qualities and characteristics. Enjoy your unique attributes and expand yourself enough to enjoy others attributes instead of comparing them to yours. I was a caretaker for the same sweet lady for almost 19 years. She once told me that if we were all the same, this world would be a pretty boring place.